Here is words of wisdom to those in need

1. When in a bad situation, you must fight to run away or resort
to use the word "Parlay" in other words, make a deal and hope that
they wont kill you anyway.

2. Never have a cat one your desk when you're typing a journal entry
because that just makes it difficult to type since the cat is walking all over the keyboard.

3.When someone is asking you what you're good at say, "I read the weak-minded and slap the senseless" and leave it at that since you
will be doing that as time goes by.

4.When on a dusty trail, always ask the tumble weed for directions.

5.If it's not broken fix it til it is.

6. When you're fixing something you can ALWAYS count on Duct tape

7. The cake...IS A LIE!!!!!!!

8. Cookies are a deception...

9. Chocolate is...a very necessary part of a girl's life.

10.Innocence is blinding

*EDIT*
11. When you have no idea what a person is talking about, always pretend you understand by smiling, nodding and the occasional
"uh huh" and\or yeah.